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Ya might be a Redneck if.....
...You think the nutcracker is somethin you did off the high dive.
...You wont stop at a rest area if you have a empty beer can in the car.
...You think Iraq is top-of-the-line Camaro.
...Your spring wardrabe mostly involves scissors. know atleast 6 ways to bend a baseball cap. own a lava lamp thats over 5 feet tall.
...there are more than 10 cats livin under your trailer.'ve ever thrown up in a squad car.
...your frist bra was a Wonderbra.'ve ever had to appear in court due to your dogs.
...You think Thunderbird is an acceptable wine choice with a bean burrito.
...your grandma enters wet t-shrit contests.
...your local grocery store also has a few pool tables.
...your septic tank is the subject of a petition. have ever tried to use food stamps to mail a watermelon. had to hitchhike on your honeymoon.
...your car and its motor are more than ten feet apart.
...stealing road signs is a family outing.
...your brother-in-law is also your uncle. sent out birth announcements for your new puppies.'ve changed a diaper on a Denny's table.'ve ever named a child for a good dog.
...your T.V. is on 24-7.
...your last keg party included a couple of 911 calls. have to mow around a refridgeator and a bed frame.'ve ever taken a date flowers you stole from a cemetery.
...Everyone in the house learns somthing from the potty training videotape.
...Diners change tables when your family sits near them.
...your prom dress was knitted. were born with a plastic spoon in your mouth.
...your bridal veil was made of window screen. think people who have elictricty are uppity.
...your college graduation ceremony includes parallel parking an 18-wheeler.
...the Marlboro man is your idol.
...all your golf balls come in egg cartons.
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